3/31/2023 0 Comments Schwartz meaning![]() A marriage is a bet on the future, one that at first seems insane to make, and then insane not to. I’ve cried while watching a couple I had never before met pledge themselves to each other on a lawn in Maine, and laughed, two minutes later, when a small plane flew directly overhead, trailing a banner ad for a local casino. It’s wonderful to take the subway to a wedding lunch of a dozen people at a friend’s apartment, and to travel to a Norwegian village to witness vows spoken in a rose garden by a fjord. I love the beautiful bureaucracy of two-minute City Hall ceremonies, and I love a bash at The Pierre. I’ve made them myself, at one point or another: their cost, their tendency toward traditionalism, their propensity to turn otherwise reasonable people into perfectionist, egomaniacal lunatics who lose their minds over things like charger plates. I know all the arguments against weddings. I attended my first wedding in utero-my parents’, which took place on a wildly hot day in May when my 40-year-old mother was five months pregnant-but the bride was never a figure of fantasy, or even much interest, for me. THE LOSS OF MOMENTUM was deflating, at first, but clarifying too. ![]() Anatomically speaking, they were close to the heart. “I just met someone I feel in my boobs,” I wrote. I texted the friend to whom I told everything that happened in my life. It didn’t hurt that he was tall and handsome in the scruffy, just-kempt sort of way that I found appealing. We would adventure across the globe and live by our pens. I didn’t speak Spanish, but I could learn. I therefore saw myself in Spain, in a broad-brimmed hat and loose cotton trousers that looked slouchy-sexy but not slouchy-schlumpy on my 50- or 65-year-old body. We were out to coffee, and J, an earnest, intelligent writer in square-framed glasses, was telling me about the three years he had spent living in Madrid. You take a person who’s caught your eye and flash forward 30 or 40 years if you like what you see, mazel tov. Granted, I had a bad habit of getting myself mentally engaged. I knew, 20 minutes into my first conversation with the man who became my fiancé, that we would be married one day. In this fantasy wedding, the bride (actor Tanya Reynolds) wore Simone Rocha (). ![]() “The loss of a wedding is a small loss to bear when the world has been turned on its head,” writes Schwartz. ![]()
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